Should wives be hot?
[Edit: This is a guest post by Nicole (more on her below). Ladies, I didn't write this, a woman did. Just wanted to clarify because some people were offended before reading because they thought it was from a dude]
First off, let me tell you that I love you. Each and every one of you. I consider you a sister, members of a not-so-exclusive club, wherein we act as helpers, friends, confidants, lovers, and partners to our husbands.
Wives rules. Period.
Now, that I have you buttered up (but please believe me, I meant each and every word) I'd like to discuss something with you. It is a phenomena that is sweeping the nation. It is ugly, dingy, sloppy, and disgraceful.
It is the unkempt wife phenomena and it ends today.
(Today's guest post is by Nicole Cottrell who is literally one of the best bloggers I know. I'm so honored to have her on today. Please don't be shy. Make her feel welcome and engage her in the comments section. But first fasten your seat-belts :) because as you can see, she doesn't pull any punches which is one of many reasons why her blog is incredible. Agree or disagree, let's hear from you.)
You see, I may be wrong, but I don't think that I am, yet it seems that a whole collection of women have come to believe that marriage is an opportunity to give up and just quit trying.
How do I know this?
Because I have seen them. I have seen these wives, strolling through Target, pushing a cart at the grocery store, out to lunch with friends.
They are women, who from afar, may appear to be zombies of some sort--disheveled, hair in a scrunchie (I mean, a scrunchie, really? It isn't 1992), sweat pants blowing in the wind.
But upon closer inspection, one realizes that these are not flesh eating creatures, so much as women who have fallen into a rut.
I'd like to help some of them out of that rut, if I can and here's why: Your husband deserves it and so do you.
Your husband deserves to come home each day (or see you come home each day, if you happen to work, as well) to the beautiful, lovely, admirable, and even sexy woman that he married.
Yet, this often isn't the case because for some strange reason, many women have fallen victim to the lie that marriage somehow ends your responsibility to remain attractive. Yes, I said responsibility. I know some people might not like that word, but it is fitting. I believe a wife has a duty to look hot. Yup, a duty for hotness.
Let's be honest too ladies, if our husbands hung out in sweats all day, rarely showered, and didn’t care if he had shaved or not, I doubt we would be too excited. Same goes for us.
If you got all dolled up before marriage and then stopped after marriage, well, my dear, that is false advertising.
Marriage is not an excuse to “get comfortable” or “let yourself go.” If ever there were a time to exert a little effort into looking good, it is in our marriages. In a culture racked with divorce, marriages are fragile enough.
We might forget it and hate to say it, but attraction is a key component to a healthy marriage and sex life.
Now, I'm not talking about being a size 12 or a size 2. I'm not talking about wearing scandalous clothing or push-ups bras. I'm also not suggesting that we have to strap on our aprons and heels, a la 1952, while prancing around the kitchen in full hair and make-up (how did they do it?).
But what I am suggesting, is that a little bit of effort goes a long way.
Here’s the thing too, I know life gets busy. I have a 5 year old, 3 year old, and an 8 month old. 'Nuff said. They leave me little time to do much of anything else besides take care of them. But I've made looking good for my man a priority.
Before my husband comes home, I sneak off to the bathroom, comb my hair, swipe on some lip gloss and mascara, and spritz some perfume. Easy peasy. Sure, my husband has seen me ragged, sweaty, grimy, and corpse-like. I have 3 kids, remember? But I try to make that the exception, not the rule.
I know my husband appreciates my effort, as well. I can see it on his face when he walks in the door. He smiles. I smile. And all is right in the world. No flesh eating monsters here, just a wife devoted to looking good for her man.
So, I say to you wives who have given up, thrown in the towel, called it a day: Join me!
Enter the land of the living, make an effort, and throw away those sweat pants and the t-shirt you won at your work conference. Join me. It's nice here. You'll love it here. You'll even leave looking prettier.
So let's hear it.
Are you or someone you know, suffering from the unkempt wife phenomena? How do you intend to pull yourself or your loved one out of it?
Do you think wives are required to look good for their husbands?
Also, If you are single, do you plan on keeping up appearances if you become married?"
Nicole Cottrell is trained in the fine art of button-pushing. She uses her skills daily on Modern Reject where she writes about the intersection of faith and culture as well as the unpopular stuff no one else likes to talk about. She loves her husband, three kiddos, strong coffee, and Him. Please connect with her on Facebook, Twitter and on her blog. Did I already mention how great her blog is?
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